Theatre's Top 5 Badly Behaved Boyfriends

Curtis is the worst! He’s soared straight to number 1 in our chart (but not the charts he’s aiming for). He may seem charming and attentive but Curtis' ambition knows no bounds. He attaches himself to the supremely talented Effie but almost immediately begins to threaten the lifelong friendship between her and the other girls.

And Curtis doesn't stop there. He demonstrates classic manipulative and coercive behaviour in his relationships and seems to hate it when others explore their own artistic freedom. Get lost Curtis! If you want to know if girl power overcomes in the end, you'll have to book yourself a ticket.

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In at number 2 is The Birthday Party’s Goldberg. You do not want to end up at a party with Goldberg (played by Stephen Mangan). He may be chatty and be up for party games but we recommend that if you ever find that you are the subject of his attention that you leave the party ASAP.

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He may have the number 1 moves in town but he’s number 3 on our do-not-date list. Lorrell loves Jimmy, so she says, but we think Lorrell can do so much better! He drinks too much, he takes drugs, he's an egomaniac plus he's already married! Lorrell gives Jimmy the best years of her life but he seems more concerned with finding the next great song. Lorrell is better off without him we say!

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Based on the Patricia Highsmith novel and touring the UK currently, Strangers on a Train has an excellent example of a totally awful guy and a girl who can do better. Pulling into the station at number 4 is Guy Haines. He's in love with Anne, a lovely girl who unfortunately is not his wife. He wants a divorce from his actual wife but doesn't want to give her any money. He makes the mistake of sharing his dilemma with a total psycho who somehow manipulates Guy into commiting a murder.

I just can't help thinking if Guy was prepared to give his first wife what she was owed, it would have saved Anne a big old mess.

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We love the show but I’m pretty sure Grinpayne is a bit of a nightmare boyfriend. He very much loves his girlfirend Dea but is so obsessed with finding out the truth behind his past that he is prepared to sacrifice everything including Dea’s safety - an oversight which brings him in at number 5 on our list. What a jerk! (Even if he does have a beautiful singing voice.) You’ll have to watch The Grinning Man to find out if Grinpayne can turn it around and win back some boyfriend brownie points.

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